As always, Jim Rohn puts it very eloquently. “You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with”!
Does it ring true for you?
It certainly is for me!
None of us deliberately choose to live an ‘average’ life. But most of us don’t choose to live an ‘exceptional’ life either.
Mediocrity is safe!
By NOT deliberately choosing to live an exceptional life, we drift in to being ordinary. We are surrounded by ordinary. We hear ordinary stuff. We continue to do ordinary jobs we hate. We run ordinary businesses. We put with ordinary results. We expect ordinary and get used to ordinary results. When we look around, we surround ourselves with ordinary people, events and actions.
Are we victims of ‘Crab Mentality’?
The term ‘crab mentality’ is widely used amongst the Filipino community. The concept of crab mentality evolves from bucket of live crabs. If one crab attempts to get away, others will pull it down, instead of allowing it to go FREE!
If you look around, you can easily see who is pulling you down and keeping you in the land of mediocrity. In many cases, the people who are very close to us and do it (pull us down) with the best of intentions. More frighteningly, we ourselves can acquire the crab mentality and pull others down – again with the best of intentions.
Escape to success
However you look at it, success cannot be achieved alone. We need to surround ourselves with people who are going to lift us higher. Our goals, dreams and hard work will come to nothing without the support of others. There is no such thing as going it alone.
How to start building an environment for your success
As I see it, there are only two options. We can choose to surround ourselves with people who are going to support us (and in return we help them with their goals) or we let others drag us down to their level of comfort.
If you are in agreement with the first option, then I have listed few ideas to build a success environment around you.
- Get clarity: It is one thing knowing what you don’t want, but you cannot move forward unless you are very ‘crystal clear’ on what you want to achieve.
- Gain ‘mastery’ on the subject you are focusing on. If you are in business work on ‘owning’ your niche. If you are planning to be a financial trader, put all your energy and effort in to mastering the art and science of become the best you can.
- “The first step in success is taken when you refuse to be captive of the environment in which you first find yourself” – Mark Caine. Walk away from people who won’t support your ideas. Easy said than done. Especially with family and friends. The point is not to sever ties with your family and friends if they are not supportive of your goals. It is important to manage their expectations, where they understand where you are heading and nothing is going to stop you getting there.
- “A rising tide lifts all boats”. Surround yourself with people who inspire possibilities. The more you handout with ‘high frequency’ people who inspire you, sooner you get uplifted to their level of success.Go networking: I know many who consider this a waste of time. It is because they ‘want’ something immediately and become disappointed when they don’t get anything. Networking is about ‘giving’ without an expectation of receiving anything in return. Attend networking events where people you look up to attend. Look for opportunities to help them unconditionally.Join local organisations where you can meet new people who align with your goals and values.Create a ‘Mastermind Group’. A mastermind group is a supportive group of like-minded people who collectively brainstorm ideas, strategies, techniques and concepts to help each other move forward in their business and life. Many mega successful people attribute their success to their mastermind group.
- Focus on your energy. It is inevitable that you will be dealing with ‘crab mentality’ people most of your life. Don’t let that drain your energy. Simply deflect their conversation politely and move on with YOUR agenda.
- Your daily activities should reflect your success journey. When a person is committed to their health and fitness, their daily activities will reflect healthy eating and good exercise regime. If the daily activities do not reflect healthy eating and exercise routine – it is simply a dream.
- Read. The fastest way to access great inspiring mentors is through their work. I.e. books, audio and video etc…
- Work with coaches and mentors. Great coaches can unlock your true power. When you pay a coach to help you, you showing absolute commitment to your success.
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